The power of loosing you

We tend to be more severe, critical and judgmental with the people that are closer to us: our partner, parents, siblings and best friends. We are usually more demanding and have higher expectations about their behaviors and their treatment toward us. I would use the world implacable to describe us. 

How come we can be so hard on them if they are the ones we love most?  We care so much about them, that it is extremely important to us to correct them, to let them know we won't put up with their injustices or selfishness and to teach them how to behave, because we want them to fit in our mold of perfection. I guess unconsciously we don't want to loose that relationship. Therefore, we try to control anything that we see as a deviation of our ideal image of love.

Let me tell you that in the problem is the solution. Whenever you are tempted to be hard on someone you love, think about this: how would you feel if tomorrow this person was gone forever? Every time, I see the possibility that this could be the last day of the life of the ones I love, I get more tolerant, patient and understanding with them. Those things that annoy me are not important anymore compared to what their loss would mean to me.

The idea of loosing someone forever is so powerful that it lead us to a new perspective about the conflicts we have with them, and at the same time it can prevent us from being hard on them.